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Lenten Devotional: Saturday, February 24
"Already and Not Yet" - Andover Newton's Lenten Devotional Series

"Already and Not Yet" is the 2018 Lenten Daily Devotional written by members of the Andover Newton community, which is also being shared at Facebook and on Twitter. Future posts here will include links to all the previous entries for easy browsing to any you might have missed or might want to revisit.

Saturday, Feb. 24, 2018
“Waiting on God” – Emily Bruce

I hate waiting. I hate yielding that control over my time, my energies, my agency. That’s what waiting feels like for me.

Lately, I have been doing a lot of waiting. Waiting-room waiting. For the nurse to call my name. For the doctor to enter my room, as I sit in those pathetically flimsy paper gowns. For test results. For the reason to exhale or perhaps the reason to cry.

As I contemplate the fragility of that which I usually take for granted – my health, my relationships, my experience of God’s presence – I marvel at the space that all of this waiting creates. There is very little else I can think about; very little else I can focus on. So, I wait. And breathe. And pray. I don’t pray away the health problem – I know better than that – but I pray for the presence of God. I pray that whatever the test results say, that I may be surrounded by love and light and support as I walk this path – the end of which cannot possibly be seen or known. I pray that I might learn to surrender to the space that this moment has given me. I pray that I may surrender to the God that loves me.

I pray.
I breathe.
And I wait.

Emily Bruce is an Andover Newton Seminary and Yale Divinity School student (MDiv ’20). She sits on the Andover Newton student steering committee, the Founders.

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